Dear Uncle Henry, I am quite nervous . I am due to meet my new girlfriend’s group of female friends in a couple of weeks at a party. They have been together and friends since school and are a very tight group and do many things together including holidays and dinners.
My girlfriend is telling me not to worry but these girls could heavily influence my girlfriend and her thoughts about me, indeed our whole relationship. She has mentioned in the past that they have ‘got rid’ of unsuitable boyfriends for other friends.
Henry – Help!
Paul, nr York, UK
Dear Paul, Gosh, Thank you for your question. Into the den of Lionesses, jolly good for you. It is one of those dating dilemmas that every man faces at some point. Along with meeting
the prospective in-laws, it is one of the most challenging meetings. I remember when I
was courting a lovely young girl and I was invited to meet her friends, who all
happened to be her University Hockey Squad, who had just come back from a reunion
tour! My knees were knocking, as visions of cries of ‘jolly hockey sticks’ and the group
descending on me haunted me for nights beforehand. Luckily for me a supply of
Guinness and some of my Officer chums in uniform turning up out of the blue and I
was a friend for life.
Sorry I digress from your challenge. Yes, a group of protective female friends can be
young relationships undoing. I will assume that you are following all of our wooing
tips here at the Perfect Gentleman and you have a pretty strong early foundation.
Which is a good start. There is no chink in armour as it were.
So, I would approach them with confidence, charm and a lack dose of humility and
humour. Be confident about meeting them, introduce yourself calmly and make an
extra effort to remember their names, this is always a good networking tip. Be
charming, if you find this a challenge either watch a lot of Cary Grant & David Niven
movies or come on the PG course to Be Charming. Ask them questions about
themselves and funny stories about their adventures at school, maybe even discuss
fashion disasters, including yours. One small piece of advice, which should be obvious,
never say anything negative about your lady, even if they start to tease her.
Be humble and self-effacing, just be you and be low key about who you are and what
you do, no matter how successful or not you maybe. And lastly, be humourous, I am
not suggesting being a Stand-Up Comedian here, otherwise you might end up like I
did on the stage in Berlin telling jokes. If you find being funny difficult, the easiest way
is to make fun of yourself, whatever things that maybe funny to others. Embarrassing
moments for you are always good, I have a few that you could have!
Well that’s it from me! Paul, Good Luck and I am sure you will be a smooth as George
Clooney. Let me know if you haven’t been mauled.
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