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Getting back on the horseIn last week’s column I wrote about change being inevitable, and thought I would follow on from that with another subject that is related and relevant to both myself, the Perfect Gentleman as a company, and the journey that we go on to achieve anything, even that of being a Gentleman. That subject is perseverance or determination.

Over the last month, both the company and I personally have been through a few challenges. I won’t bore you with listing exactly what they are here, but suffice to say, like everyone else, there are issues about finances, the future, health and other things.  The kind of things that make up everyone’s issues everywhere in the world. We are all the same in that we all face challenges and setbacks, the key is how we move forward.

There will always be challenges, and people will always knock you down, set you back and make things difficult. There was a post on Facebook by a friend which listed some of the successful people that had setbacks or rejections and it is a broad list: Jack London; Walt Disney; Harrison Ford; Albert Einstein; J K Rowling; Fred Astaire; Charlie Chaplin, the list goes on and on.  The thing is, we are not alone.

Last week I discussed a number of ways to deal with inevitable Change and how to move on, but the one factor I neglected was Determination, or, if you prefer, Perseverance.  It is a key factor in dealing with change, life and the obstacles that come across our path. Indeed, we talk about determination as a true trait of the Gentleman in our Manifesto, it is a key factor in success in life.

We all fall off the horse from time to time and in those times it can be painful, frustrating, embarrassing or difficult, or indeed all of these. Each time that you fall off, it can become more difficult to get up as those feelings mentioned before can compound. STOP! Let us pause and not go down a spiral. All of those things are temporary feelings. Even the injuries are temporary, you will heal.

Determination is about keeping going, it is based on belief or faith and indeed passion. When we talk about faith or belief, what we mean is the surety of knowledge that what you are doing is right and meant to be. Occasionally, that may falter. We are human after all. We need to be able to see with clarity our end goal, the thing that we wish to achieve.  So make sure that your Goal is clear, bright and specific.

We all need passion to drive us forward and that is true when we all off. To find that passion again, do something that makes you happy or something that will inspire you and re-light that fire. Will all need fuel on the fires of zeal, so go out and find those logs of fervour.

There is no point falling off if you don’t learn the reason why. Whether it was your mistake, an external factor or a miscommunication, we all need to find the lesson that we are meant to learn and heed it. Otherwise we will keep falling off in the same way, until we learn.

Finally, I always refer to Winston Churchill. We think of him as a stalwart and steadfast icon and yet even he had his ‘black dog days’. He would pick himself up and move forward, that “never give in” spirit.

Therefore, if we have that clarity of purpose, the passion that goes with it, the ability to learn and relentless drive, then we can pick ourselves up, get back on that horse and ride off into the Sunset….

A Gentleman’s Hints for Getting Back on the Horse

Focus on the End Result –

Make the end result clear to you – write or visualise the ‘specific’ thing or things that mean you know you will have achieved your goal.

Learn from the Falls –

Make sure you learn the lesson as to why you fell that time. Write down the lessons that you have learned.

Do something that makes you Happy –

When you struggle with picking yourself up, you need to do something that makes you happy or fills you with inspiration. Read a book, take a walk, or paint a picture.

Think Churchill –

Even Churchill had doubts and bad days but he moved forward and led a nation through it’s darkest hours.

See you in the Saddle!

Determinedly yours,



Here’s the song “Pick Yourself Up” from the 1936 film “Swing Time”, starring Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers

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