Do you know the difference between wooing and seduction?
You may argue that they are one and the same but they most certainly are not. While both are concerned with attracting, the key difference lies in the results you achieve. Namely, getting the girl or indeed girls. Like any great craft, the art of Wooing needs to be learnt and nurtured so that you will eventually be the master.
So what is the difference between Wooing and Seduction?
According to an on-line dictionary, Seduction seems to be an act which just has one thing in mind, sex. The one night stand which will achieve a quick erotic high and then… what? Dissatisfaction and frustration at not having the ‘toy’ available to play with anymore.
So you go in search of another lady, you seduce her and the whole frustrating and dissatisfying cycle starts again. Moreover, the lady or ladies you have seduced will probably be hurt or even worse for you, she will look back and think ‘who was that chap? I can’t even remember him!’
Now tell me gentlemen, do you want to be remembered by a lady or do you want to be forgotten? I have no doubt that you want to be remembered. But remembered in a way which will make her feel good and, furthermore, that will improve your reputation as she tells her friends about you.
You will soon be known as the Perfect Gentleman and not just be surrounded by all the ladies but adored by them.
This is where wooing enters the scene. As the dictionary says; wooing is more about affection and the thrill of the chase and about you yourself feeling good about it.
It is about that ancient and yet very modern art, the art of courtly love. The art studied and practiced by the troubadours, knights and warriors of the past where they would sally forth to fight an enemy in order to win a maiden’s hand.
These men were gentle and men; gentlemen, who were artists but also warriors. They were specialists in their craft – wooing and enchanting ladies. Making them feel good whilst feeling very good about themselves. They were Perfect Gentlemen.
So why does a woman like to be wooed?
Here, I draw on my own ideas about why I think a woman likes to be wooed, I believe that it is more masculine and civilized when a man woos a lady. The idea of the warrior battling obstacles to get to paradise (the lady) springs to mind. I also believe that wooing makes a lady feel appreciated because of all the effort and care that has been put into the act by the gentleman.
It indicates that an attentive and loving man is interested in me, as the lady, and who is looking forward to my company rather than just my body. Through this effort of caring and attentive acts, I, as the lady feel pampered and loved. And let’s face it ladies – we love to be pampered in every respect.
So, is wooing a skill or an art a Gentleman should learn? Absolutely! It is both a skill and an art because any art starts off as a skill which can be taught by a teacher. The art emerges when the pupil becomes the master and adds his own style and personality to the skill.
So Gentlemen, if you are a master of the art of wooing, then you really are a ‘Perfect Gentleman’.
I like the distinctions you made here.